Wednesday, October 7, 2009

The Farmer's Donkey


One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well.
The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer
tried to figure out what to do.
Finally, he decided the animal was old,
and the well needed to be covered up
anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve
the donkey.
He invited all his neighbors to
come over and help him.
They all grabbed a shovel and began
to shovel dirt into the well.
At first, the donkey realized what
was happening and cried horribly.
Then, to everyone's amazement he
quieted down.A few shovel loads
later, the farmer finally looked down the well.
He was astonished at what he saw.
With each shovel of dirt that hit his back,
the donkey was doing something amazing.
He would shake it off and take a step up..
As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel
dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off
and take a step up.Pretty soon, everyone
was amazed as the donkey stepped up over
the edge of the well, and happily trotted off!
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt.
The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it
off and take a step up. Each of our troubles
is a steppingstone. We can get out of the
deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up!
Shake it off and take a step up.
NOW ....... Enough of that...
The donkey later came back,
and bit the farmer who had tried to bury him.
The gash from the bite got infected and the
farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock.

MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:

When you try to cover your .....,

it always comes back to bite you.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

School

All right so I am taking my first 2 classes
since I received my Associates Degree at
Snow College in 2001.

School has proven difficult! What was I thinking
when I decided to go back to school?????

I often have to remind myself the reasons...

1. A better job..a job that I will enjoy and can be
creative while doing it.

2. A better life for my family...hopefully with the
skills I learn at school I will be able to give my
family a better life...not living pay check to pay
check and robbing Peter to pay Paul.

3. An example to my children. I am hoping that
by going back to school I will be able to set a
great example to my kids to show them they
can do what they want! Not to let ANYTHING
stand in their way!

4. To prove to myself that I can still learn and
grow! That I am still able to give my opinion and
have my voice heard! After such a long time of
NOT being able to have my OWN opinion I can
finally speak my mind. Which is funny I was told
this week at work I need to keep my opinion to
myself and not be so opinionated. Well, fui on the
that!! MY OPINION IS IMPORTANT AND DON'T
TELL ME IT IS NOT!!!

5. Because I can! I have the support of my
wonderful husband and my great children!
Others that are supportive of my decision!

Well, web design world here I come!!

Monday, September 14, 2009

WET PANTS

Come with me to a third grade classroom......
There is a nine-year-old kid sitting
at his desk and all of a sudden,
there is a puddle between his feet
and the front of his pants are wet.
He thinks his heart is going to stop
because he cannot possibly imagine
how this has happened.
It's never happened before,
and he knows that when the
boys find out he will never hear the end of it.
When the girls find out,
they'll never speak to him again
as long as he lives...
The boy believes his heart is going to stop;
he puts his head down and prays this prayer,
'Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now!
Five minutes from now I'm dead meat.'
He looks up from his prayer and
here comes the teacher with a look
in her eyes that says he has been discovered.
As the teacher is walking toward him,
a classmate named Susie is carrying a
goldfish bowl that is filled with water.
Susie trips in front of the teacher and
inexplicably dumps the bowl of water
in the boy's lap. The boy pretends to be angry,
but all the while is saying to himself,
'Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!'
Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object
of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy.
The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives
him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out.
All the other children are on their hands
and knees cleaning up around his desk.
The sympathy is wonderful.
But as life would have it, the ridicule
that should have been his has been
transferred to someone else - Susie.
She tries to help, but they tell her to get out.
You've done enough, you klutz!'
Finally, at the end of the day,
as they are waiting for the bus,
the boy walks over to Susie and whispers,
'You did that on purpose, didn't you?'
Susie whispers back, 'I wet my pants once too..'
May God help us see the opportunities
that are always around us to do good...
Each and everyone one of us is going
through tough times right now,
but God is getting ready to bless
you in a way that only He can. Keep the faith.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Golf anyone???

ACTUAL CALLS RECEIVED
AT THE PUBLIC GOLF COURSE
(Amherst, Mass.)

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: What are your green fees?
Staff: 38 dollars.
Caller: Does that include golf?


Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, I need to get some information from you.
First, is this your correct phone number?


Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, we have a tee time for two
weeks from Friday. What's the weather
going to be like that day?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, I had a tee time for this afternoon
but I'm running late. Can you still get me out early?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, do you have one of those areas
where you can buy a bucket of golf balls
and hit them for practice?
Staff: You mean a driving range?
Caller: No, that's not it..,,,


Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller:Yes, I'd like to get a tee time
tomorrow between 12 o'clock and noon.
Staff: Between 12 o'clock and noon?
Caller: Yes.
Staff: We'll try to squeeze you in.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Do you have any open
tee times around 10 o'clock?

Staff: Yes, we have one at 10:15.
Caller: What's the next time after that?
Staff: We have one at 10:22.
Caller: We'll take that one. It will be a bit warmer.


Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: How much to play golf today?
Staff: 25 to walk, 38 with a cart.
Caller:38 dollars?
Staff: No, 38 yen.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: What do you have for tee times tomorrow?
Staff: What time would you like?
Caller: What times do you have?
Staff: What time of the day?
Caller: Any time.
Staff: Morning or afternoon?
Caller: Whenever.
Staff: We have 16 times open in the morning
and 20 open in the afternoon.
Would you like me to read the whole list?

Caller: No, I don't think any of those times will work for me.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Do you have a dress code?
Staff: Yes, we do. We require soft spikes.
Caller: How about clothes?
Staff: Yes, you have to wear clothes.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller:Yes, do you have a driving range there?
Staff: Yes.
Caller: How much for a bucket of large balls?
Staff: Sorry, we're all out of large balls.
But we can give you twice as many
small balls for the same price.


Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Can I get a tee time for tomorrow?
Staff: Sure, what time would you like?
Caller: Something between 9 o'clock and 10 o'clock. In the morning, if possible.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Do you rent golf clubs there?
Staff: Yes, they're 25 dollars.
Caller: How much to rent a bag?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, my husband just called me
on his cell phone and told me
he's on the 15th hole.
How many more holes does he
have to play before he gets to the 18th?


Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, do you have a driving range there?
Staff: Yes.

Caller: How much for a large bucket?
Staff: Four dollars.
Caller: Does that include the balls?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Do you have a twilight rate?
Staff: Yes, it's 15 dollars after 2 o'clock.
Caller: And what time does that start?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, I'd like some info about your golf course.
Staff: OK, what would you like to know?
Caller: I don't know, that's why I called.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: My kids just came home with
pockets full of range balls and said they
stole them from your driving range.
Would you like to buy them back?

Okay I don't play golf but these were funny!!

Thursday, September 3, 2009

I did it!!

I am once again a College Student!!
I am going back to get my degree in Computer Information System
with an emphasize in Web Development and Design!
I took my first class Tuesday night
Introduction to Business...let me tell you
I was scared to death! I was excited nervous
and couldn't sleep the night before!
But when I got to class it was like I had
never left school! I sat in the front row, upright and
excited to learn!
Then last night was my first online
lecture class! Now that is a whole different
experience! The teacher lectures and you
listen online over the World Wide Web!!
Then if you have questions you type in a
chat room and he will answer your questions!
It was all quite interesting! It was a good class!
Well, now the first classes are over I have HOMEWORK
again!! Maybe it will help the kids do their homework
if they see mom doing her homework!
I just hope my children will see and understand
the example that I am setting for them! I am
doing this for them! To give them more in life
and for them to know that if you want something
go for it! Don't wait! Don't let that jerk of a professor
tell you that you can't do something! I am so grateful to
be at the point in my life I would tell him now
"Stick you dumb idea up yours"
Because I CAN, I WILL AND I AM GOING TO BE PROGRAMMER!!
YOU CAN'T STOP ME OR BE LITTLE ME!!!
I am to that point!!
I WILL PROVE HIM WRONG!!!
I am thankful for a husband who is behind me 110%
giving me encouragement and cheering for me on
the sidelines!!
Thank you to everyone that been supportive!!
It means so much to me!!